a b i t d r y . . .

Winter is here and its getting abit dry. I've got leg dandruff :/ Yes yes I do moisturise, although sometimes I skip it cos I'm like late for uni or whatever other activity I'm late for. But yeh far out...maybe I should just shower with Head and Shoulders. After all, I do shower with Clairol Herbal Essence.....just cos it froths well and it smells so nice! I mean, just cos it says Shampoo doesnt mean you cant use it as a shower gel right? :p

Got this essay due soon. Sigh.... mental block. I used to be able to spout out like 25 words a minute literally but now.... one paragraph a morning/arvo. Sheeesh... see thats what happens when you stop writing in your diary, and when you stop reading books, and when you stop thinking in creative writing/3rd person style. Feh.

Hehehe speaking of Feh, I watched Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles the other day. Number one, they've changed their song! Number two, is it me or do they look different? o.O Seriously, all these cool 80's cartoons making a come back, but why do they have to change the cartoon! Theres a new Transformers, a new My Little Pony and now a new TMNT?? What is the world coming to! :(

Okay end rant, time to sleep :3

Add some zest

One of my more favourite interests which I have picked up in AUstralia is cooking. I really, really enjoy cooking. My family wouldnt let me near a stove when I was younger and never really got to cook much. First time I used an oven was at a friend's house, I was around 14. Second time I ever used one was here, in Australia. Followed by numerous other oven obsessive dishes. I mean, how easy is it!!!!! Truly a wonderful invention.

Alot of my high school friends have also picked up cooking when they went overseas. Some more daring than I in trying new dishes. I stumbled across this recipe website today. I find it really good cos it not only has a section on recipes for special dietary requirements, but it really specialises in bringing you recipes for dishes from around the world. Like the African Tiger Salenga. Its like an africanised version of the Spanish paella. Also found africanised versions of rissotto and meatloaf. So interesting!!

Im so inspired, Im gonna make a great aussie dish tommorow! The all famous.... barbeque :D

Calamity Jane

A mouse ran away the other day and we only found her something like 3-4 days later. She was in a humane mouse trap but by then, she was considerably stressed and weak from starvation and dehydration. We tried to revive her with glucose and saline shots, but to no avail. She passed on the next day, cold and grey. She shouldn't have run away in the first place. It did not benefit neither her nor myself.

This kind of depicts where I'm at with Honours at the moment. I feel like as if everything I do has no benefit to anyone. I've also become increasingly careless, leading to more frustration. I've always sort of believed in the whole "good luck" - "bad luck" cycle. Where if today sucks, and it sucks in more or less threes, then things will start to pick up. In more or less threes. Maybe its an observation that had been moulded by mindsets cos lately, iIt doesnt seem to be picking up at all and this "bad luck" cycle sure aint stopping at three!

There are two possible explanations:

1. Im doomed to calamity for all eternity
2. Im just not seeing the good things in life anymore

I wonder if its the latter. It better not be. Cos if it is, it means I've become an adult. Yuck.

The Competent for the incompetent

Oh gaze of Love so melt my pride
that I may in Your house but kneel
and in my brokeness to cry
spring worship unto Thee

Jars Of Clay :: Hymn

I sometimes get so sick of being incompetent. Of being mediocre and nominal and lukewarm. I spend all my energy on something that isn't even worth anything, I look upon envy at people who give up so much for what is right, my insides wring with guilt at the extinct moments full of empty promises, my body and mind is wretched from the heartache I bestow upon myself.

My struggles are futile. And why? They are empty, selfish.

Dont you dare tell me that Im beating myself over something stupid, something purely philosophical, something mere man had made up for world domination or personal satisfaction. I know better, and you should know better.

I am not catholic enough to think that my short comings are dragging me to hell. Im not anglican enough to think that I need to win God's favour. But I do love Him enough to hate how I ignore Him day after day. After all that He has done, after all that He has shown. My bones are filled with groaning, my heart is heavy. It is time to take drastic measures.

Sweet Jesus carry me away
from cold of night and dust of day
in ragged hour or salt worn eye
be my desire my wellspring lie

Jars Of Clay :: Hymn